That moment. That moment you see your child for the first time. That moment she is there, living, breathing, right there in front of you.
I’m talking about the moment that changes your life forever.
I’ve always wanted to be a father. I certainly had some moments in my life where I wondered if it was ever going to happen, but I still always held a belief that it would—and now it has.
I was surrounded by children throughout my upbringing. I have four siblings, 13 nieces and nephews, and even have two great nephews. I was SO confident going into this whole father thing. I convinced myself that I had more experience than many first-time dads.
Except…. nothing can prepare you for that moment.
As the birth was unfolding, I was completely overcome with emotion and barely holding on. Tears were dying to burst from my eyes (and they eventually made their way out). I stood watching my beautiful fiancé and mother to my about-to-be-born-child fighting through that standard enormous amount of birthing pain (I felt sooo helpless!). The doctor at the edge of the bed, doing doctor things, while simultaneously radiating a sense of confidence and a strong feeling of “I got this, dad—this ain’t my first rodeo!” And of course several amazing nurses gathered all around yelling “just keep pushing, you’re almost there!” (the birth video is at the end of the article if you want to check it out)
Looking back, it would almost be accurate to describe it as complete chaos, but yet, at the same time, absolutely beautiful.
Witnessing the birth of my daughter was the single greatest moment of my entire life.
The next few days were a blur. We didn’t exactly sleep well at the hospital, something I am sure many other parents can attest to.
We brought our adorable newborn baby girl home and the parenting journey was officially underway. It quickly hit me that, wow, another human is living with you. Oh, and not just any human, but a human that relies on you in almost every conceivable way. Yet in almost a crazy plot twist that seems more fit for a fictional movie love story—despite knowing this human for just a few days, this is someone you would already do absolutely anything for.
Sooo let me get this straight. This little girl has been out of the womb for a grand total of 72 hours and I’m already willing to drop and do whatever she asks of me? And whether I even get to sleep is now basically completely up to her?
Yup, that’s right—the life of a first-time dad has arrived!
By the way, the gravitational pull you feel to your child is insane. Again, it’s just one of those things that would be truly impossible to accurately describe. It’s something you have to physically feel to possibly even begin to understand the power. There is nothing like it.
When she looks into my eyes, it’s the most mesmerizing experience each and every time. I have to imagine it releases some type of endorphins or some atom or enzyme or SOMETHING into a father’s body (and I’m sure a mother’s too, but this is a dad blog!) because I think I might actually be getting high as she sits in my arms, eyes wide open, looking at me.
By the way, to top this all off, I have no clue if she can even see me clearly! But to be honest, I couldn’t care less. The feeling is so incredible that even if she can’t see me, I don’t care. Give me more of that feeling.
Here’s a quick story on just how powerful all of this stuff is. On the fifth or sixth day of her being alive, I was gone for a solid block of time getting some work done at the office. When I came home, I said something out loud to Aralyn, and I could of swore she turned her head!
“Did she hear me!?!” “Does she know my voice!?!” “OMG, I think she might know my voice!!!”
These are literally the thoughts I had that day. There is zero exaggeration here. Filling my entire body up with genuine joy at the fact my daughter might recognize the sound of my voice.
It sounds so crazy as I type that out… except it’s not. It’s the feelings a new dad experiences and it’s both a powerful and beautiful thing.
My daughter, Elly, is about two and half weeks old now. I still can’t fully wrap my head around how insane of an experience this has been thus far.
My life is transforming in so many ways and it hasn’t even been a month. I feel like I am a different person. I feel like I am a man with much higher levels of responsibility and that is probably because I am.
I think I am still fully coming to grips with how from the moment Elly came out of Aralyn’s body, my life transformed forever. It will never be the same. I think it’s weird in a way because as I mentioned, I always planned on being a father, so you would think I’d have already have anticipated things would be different. I’m sure where the discrepancy is stemming from is I had no idea they would be this different this fast.
I already find myself changing behavior. I find myself realizing it’s no longer just about me, or about Aralyn—it’s about Elly and her well-being.
To wrap this up, here’s one last quick story. I had a business meeting the other day and I was speaking to the president of the company. I have a marketing company and we were discussing services for her business. It was unique in that usually there are more than two people in the room for a meeting.
With it just being the two of us, it gave us a chance to connect a bit personally as well. I mentioned I had a newborn baby at home and as we chatted further she said this to me: “I believe life has a way of giving you exactly what you need, when you need it.”
I think I got goosebumps when she said that. I don’t think I was lost in my life before the birth of my daughter, but I do believe the next phase of my life was due to arrive.
Turns out it was due to arrive on March 3rd, 2019, but instead it arrived on March 8th, 2019.
It arrived in the form of the most beautiful baby girl that I could have ever possibly imagined. It arrived in the form of more responsibility as a man, less sleep at night, more appreciation for parents around the world and less worries about the small stuff in life.
It arrived as a feeling of love and joy that has filled me up in the most incredible way.
It arrived as my beautiful and precious daughter, Elly Rae Becker.
Welcome to parenthood, dad.
The single most transformational moment in my entire life was witnessing the birth of my daughter. Take a peak at the moment that changed my life forever, welcomed our beautiful daughter into the world and officially started my journey as a first-time dad.